Blond Facial Hair: American Dream or American Myth?

June 6, 2008

As we journey through Yellowstone and Grand Teton, I think it’s important to address another glaring issue with our road trip: facial hair.

In particular, the blond beard.

Phil, John, and I are currently attempting to grow “Road Trip Beards” as we traverse the country and I am once again faced with what many deem an impossible task: to have blond facial hair and not look like a complete clown.

This will be my second attempt at a blond beard, after an unsuccessful attempt last year. Commonalities heard throughout that first two-week facial hair affair included: “What is that on your face?” or “Seriously, you need to shave that.” While I tried my best to endure the blond man’s beard struggle, I ultimately decided to shave it off. The entire ordeal left me questioning, why? Why, if blonds supposedly have more fun do they lack the ability to rock the goat or a fumanchu? I have come up with the conclusion that a blond beard, like a yeti or Sasquatch, could be a mere myth. Can a truly blond man successfully have facial hair?

While John, Phil, and I have considered this trip a mere vacation after graduation, to me it’s also a personal journey to answer some important life questions as I enter the real world. I will continue to grow facial hair throughout the next few weeks and will keep you posted.

Oh, and convince John and Phil to keep their facial hair — especially a handlebar mustache for Bruer.

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Posted by Justin

Moose Drool

June 6, 2008

So far, we’re sticking to our schedule, but we might have to adjust depending on the rain.

We got up really early yesterday to get to Mount Rushmore around when the gates opened at 8, since the forecast was showing increasing rain as the morning went on. When we got there, the monument was hidden in a heavy fog, but after we walked around the half-mile trail, it started to clear up. Though it was cloudy, we were finally able to get some clear shots of the four guys on the wall, as Justin’s father calls it.

Leaving Rapid City, we hit some really bad storms. It didn’t start clearing up until we left South Dakota, got through part of Wyoming and into Montana. We saw a lot of beautiful scenery as we crossed the state, especially as we neared the Rockies; pictures from the car couldn’t do it justice.

All told yesterday, we drove something over 500 miles, which made for a long day in the car. We arrived in Gardiner, Montana at around 7 last night, where we had booked a hotel outside of the north entrance to Yellowstone.

We drove through the very, very small town quickly to see what dinner options we had, ultimately settling on the Antler Pub & Grill across the street.

We walked in and at first felt like deer in the headlights. It was a smoky second story bar attached to a Comfort Inn, with what looked like a couple of truckers and a tourist couple sitting at the bar doing shots. We were going to awkwardly make our way out, but the bartender was so damn friendly, we couldn’t leave.

He turned on the basketball game and the couple passed along their appetizers they hadn’t eaten. The bartender only had local microbrews on tap, and gave us samples. We ultimately decided on the red ale — the Glacier Ale.

To eat, we all tried the local favorite, the Crazy Mountain Alfredo, and had a few drinks. As the game ended, we prepared to close our tab, but the bar began to get crowded and we started making friends. We switched over to the brown ale — the Moose Drool — and spent the next four hours talking with the cute bartender from Green Bay — who moved here for the summer in between semesters at the University of Wisconsin — a couple of guys from London — who could’ve been our grandfathers — and two buddies with a kid from Joliet, Illinois — who had bought a minivan and were heading west.

So much for getting to sleep early: we stayed till last call at 2. We haven’t gotten an early start to the day, but it was light until well past 9 last night, so if the rain clouds clear up, we still should be able to get a full day in Yellowstone.

Not sure where we’ll be staying tonight, but we’re taking it as it comes. We still want to see Grand Teton and Glacier, before heading up towards Calgary early next week.

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Posted by Phil